I wanna cheer up. I don’t even understand why I feel depressed. I do know I that I don’t want to do anything. Its like I have no energy; I just want to sleep..
There’s this huge knot in my stomach. I’m super nervous come fall. I want to puke.. I’m so scared.. i don’t know how to handle all this..
Anonymous asked: Do you have someone you can trust to talk to?
Yes, I have two people I can talk to.
So my cute wittle kitten Diva keeps putting her paw up to my face (gently, of course.) And that supposedly means I love you in cat :D tehe
Why do the two people I’m closest to insist that they’re fuck ups. I know the both of them are doing there best. Yes, you both have made some mistakes; but who has never made a mistake before? EVERYONE has. Yes, it seems like every step you take, you take two back. But someone told me that things don’t look better until things are worse. You both aren’t fuck ups. You both are trying.
Vr I hate feeling like this.. I want to die. I’m scared, I used to cry whenever I thought about doing it. But now that I’ve thought about a way.. It’s like I have accepted it. I hate this fucking numb feeling. But the numbness always faded away.. I keep trying to ignore this want.. but whenever I’m alone I want to. Especially alone in my bed… I thought about it in my bed, planned it in my bed.
I need to quit fucking up.. BE SUPPORTIVE JESSICA!
What if I end up going to college in the fall by myself? I don’t think I can handle that… I don’t think our relationship could work if she stayed… I guess we’ll see in August..